Your work is important. It is responsible for helping our workplaces become more diverse, equitable and inclusive. We are all a part of a larger community of DEI practitioners who are trying to solve many of the same issues in our workplaces. In this moment, whether you feel on top of the world, or frustrated and tired, remember: you are not alone.
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Are your workplace discussions on race really designed to positively impact BIPOC employees, or are they centered around helping white employees live with the discomfort of racism? If you are thinking of having discussions on race, think about the experience of your BIPOC employees. Notice and appreciate the vulnerability and risk they are taking in participating in this at work. Please don’t expect them to participate or speak about the issue. Give them space after the discussions take place.
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I recently binged a few episodes of Tracee Ellis Ross’ show Mixed-ish. It’s a story of how Tracee’s character grew up as a biracial child. The show brought back a lot of memories for me. I am a biracial American. My mother is Ukrainian, and my father is Nigerian. Growing up split between two worlds was difficult. I wish I could say that it got easier. I think the challenges change, but the question always remains: Which side are you going to choose?
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In the 1940s movie Gaslight, Ingrid Bergman’s husband drives her insane by repeatedly denying that the very real things she experienced even happened at all. This movie gave rise to the term “gaslighting” to refer to when a person or group of people deliberately work to distort your judgments, minimize your work, or distort your recollection of events. If you work in diversity and inclusion, you’ve likely experienced gaslighting in your work at some point. Do any of these experiences sound familiar?
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Imagine yourself an elite athlete. You constantly train, practice your skills, and compete in games. If your team wins or loses, you focus on what went wrong during the games. You apply those deficiencies by perfecting particular skills in future games. You practice, play, and train. Time flies by and soon you are retired. You look back and realize that you did not take the time to truly enjoy the game. When you think about your daily work, are you working in this manner?
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