Have you ever been the only person with a marginalized identity in a group and felt like you did not fit the culture? Have you ever felt that you needed to dress a certain way to feel included? Racial code-switching doesn’t just apply to changing speech patterns, but also to clothing, hair, tone of voice, and behavior or interests.
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I lost my fiancé to COVID-19 in April 2020. The death count numbers were shared on a nightly news channel. People were relegated to just a number! Who were these people? Did they have families? What were their ages? What happened? Was their experience like my beloved one’s? But most importantly: What were their stories, behind all of these other attributes? The nameless faces haunted me at night.
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My first encounter with microaggressions was when I was working in a clothing store at a local mall. As I was folding the sweaters on the display wall my co-worker walked up behind me and asked with a grin, “Are you mixed?” Being the naïve 17-year-old that I was, I eagerly answered her question and responded with no. She challenged my response by asking yet another question of my identity. “So, are you fully Black?” she questioned again. Feeling proud to be a Black woman, I answered with a resounding “yes!” Then she proceeded to tell me how pretty I am — “for a Black woman.” I smiled and for about 10 seconds felt like the prettiest woman in the world. Then it hit me: That was not a compliment — that was a direct insult to my entire race.
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